Approaching Remarriage

I'm hesitant to tread very far into all the relational and spiritual aspects of remarriage. Let me just comment on the unfortunate possibility of a widowed or divorced individual – particularly one with sizeable financial assets – being preyed upon by someone of the opposite sex. I've observed how vulnerable the newly single may be to remarrying too quickly or remarrying those primarily interested in their money. The stories are sad but true.

Certainly, remarriage should be considered carefully and only after a couple has sought premarital counseling. Here are a few pointers specifically related to finances that may be helpful:

  • Obtain premarital counseling together. (Warning sign alert: He or she is not willing to do so.)
  • Consider your dependent children's financial future. You may want to fund college, set money aside in a trust, or otherwise reserve funds for your children. (Warning sign alert: He or she wants you to use your money to buy jointly owned assets or is resistant about setting some aside for your children.)
  • Be discreet and guarded about financial details early in your dating or courting relationship. (Warning sign alert: He or she seems too interested in financial details too early.)
  • Meet together with a financial advisor you can trust. (Warning sign alert: He or she refuses to consider the advisor's recommendations.)
  • Have an accountability partner to act as a sounding board for anything that sounds unusual—a wise uncle, a parent, a friend who's been in the same position. (Warning sign alert: He or she doesn't want you to confide in anyone else.)
From Faith-Based Family Finances, published by Tyndale House Publishers. Copyright © 2008, Ron Blue. All rights reserved. International copyright secured. Used by permission.

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